Tag Archives: real world

FRY

FRY

Early in the morning before all the stores were open, two men arrived in a nondescript gray sedan. They had looked the small town over, debated on several escape routes, and finally decided they would leave on the same street they came in. It could have been any other street but their choice was probably the best because the other streets were not as clean.
“Odd way of thinking about a getaway street but there had to be some criteria for picking an escape route.” I remember telling the sheriff that after the ill-fated episode. We were just sitting on the porch, after the robbery, playing lawyer, trying to come up with reasonable explanations why someone would rob a café when there was a bank right next door. It still doesn’t make sense.
Anyway, these two men sauntered into the café, sniffed the air, and plunked down on a couple of swivel chairs. “It’s gonna be a hot one today,” the short man said. “I bet you could fry an egg on the sidewalk.”
One of the waitresses, Rebecca, was busy wrapping the silverware so she almost missed the expression on the stranger’s face when Ruth said, “Bobby, don’t bother using the skillets or frying pans today. This man says he wants his egg cooked on the sidewalk so it can get more flavor.”
“Now, honey, I didn’t say that. you’re stretching the truth and making me mad. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I just want an ordinary breakfast so we can be back on the road.”
“Where you all heading? You don’t want to be on the road after ten. And make sure you put on plenty of sunscreen. You’ll fry if you’re in the sun too long.”
The short man said, “We’ll take our chances. Now give us each a breakfast and be quick about it. We’ve got to be in El Paso before noon. And,” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small gun. “I want all of you to finance the adventure.” He looked around the room. “Put all your money in this bag. George will be coming around to collect.”
“As soon as I fry these hash browns and flip the eggs, I’ll be right with you,” Rebecca called out. “We’re short-handed right now. The other waitress went home sick and Floyd, the cook, is out getting supplies. I can’t tell you when the cash drawer will open. It’s on a timer. The cash was counted this morning and delivered to the bank. You might as well put your gun away and have a cup of coffee. You’ll feel much better if you get your blood circulating. Last week, Bill was feeling poorly and got real cranky. He didn’t settle down until he had coffee and some apple crisp. Did I tell you Sally Mae is the best pie maker in Succotash County? She fries the apples before mixing them with the other ingredients. She will probably win the blue ribbon this year too.”
“Lady, I have no interest in Sally Mae’s pies. I thought her apple crisp was tasteless, like it was fried on the street. Please don’t make me hurt you. If we get caught this would be my third strike. The judge said if we got in trouble again we would fry on the rack.”
“George, will you check our escape and make sure nobody’s in our path?”
George did not return as expected. Shorty, the short man, found George and two other gang members working the grill, selling hot dogs and hamburgers. It was the first time the Succotash County Wildcats made enough cash to purchase matching uniforms .
It was the start of a new era. The Wildcats reigned as champions for several years. The Bad News Wildcats did quite well until that notorious girls’ team beat them in the championship. That humiliating experience was fried into their memory but never mentioned again.

COLONOSCOPY

COLONOSCOPY
My body is playing tricks again,
And it’s driving me insane.
I’m tired of all the drama,
And tired of all the pain.
My doctor’s appointment is scheduled,
It would be sad if I should miss,
Especially if the doctor shouts,
“Hey, everyone! Come and look at this!”
I understand it’s not fun and games
To get a colonoscopy,
It might be fun for someone else,
But it’s not much fun for me!
Nothing to eat but an awful drink,
What could possibly be any sadder?
Oops! It’s time to go!
The drink affects my bladder!
Doctor, just check me out,
The procedure is long overdue.
Which way are you going in,
To get the scenic view?
You’ve done this procedure numerous times,
Please be gentle and not rough.
The nurses have prepped me up,
So, doc, do your stuff!

April 15, 2017

WHY DO YOU SAY THAT?

Cranky? Don’t accuse me of something
When I come into the room.
I haven’t had my coffee,
And I’ve heard the voice of doom.
I’m not sure I’ll wake up tomorrow
And maybe I won’t last today
So don’t accuse me of being cranky
And keep everyone out of my way.
My hair is falling out
My cough is getting worse,
Why are you asking questions?
Is this poetry time, rhyme and verse?
My car wouldn’t start,
I must have walked a mile,
So get out of my face.
I don’t have time for a smile.
I think there’s a problem,
This company is operating at a loss,
I can’t put my finger on it
Even though I’m the boss.
Taxes are higher and overdue,
Cranky? I don’t think that’s true
Just because one of our clients
Is saying he will sue.
The sun must be on vacation,
You’re the one who was at the door
I was minding my own business,
I don’t want to hear anymore.

April 15, 2017

NOW, THEN, OR WHEN?

It’s hard to keep topics timely.
Whatever I say or do,
Is often out of view.
What was said yesterday,
Is swallowed up by today.
Forgotten. Pushed aside. Covered up.
Two hundred girls, chemicals used,
A murder in our town,
What does timely mean
If we ignore what’s going down?
There’s not much we can do
If we only sit and stew.
How can we write with pride
If important things are set aside?
We have to be timely.

LABEL

What would it look like if we each had a label?
Would it say, Please do not remove under penalty of law?
Would we have to prove we deserved it,
Would it be something everyone saw?
Please give me more information,
Tell me where and how I was made,
Would I be rated and checked out yearly,
Would there be taxes someone paid?
This would all be so confusing
To know everything without doubt,
And would the label allow someone,
To knock my stuffing out?
It would not be easy to start over anew.
I think I like the way I am,
And you look good being you.

April 11, 2017

TAUT

She works out with determination,
Keeping her body slim and taut.
What can I say about her,
Except she’s hot, hot, hot!
She dresses out quickly,
Eager to stay on schedule
Muscles stretching in time
With musical beat,
She bounces from one exercise
To the next,
Her skin glowing with beauty.
“Ah, she’s a real woman,”
I heard someone say.
She jiggles in the right places,
Although she’s strong and taut,
She is everything I admire,
And she’s hot, hot, hot!

LUKEWARM

We are a team gliding across the glass,
Moving as if time and space stood still,
and yet, our hearts are frozen,
Held apart without passion, without thrill.
To the naked eye we are a team chiseled from ice,
Effortlessly moving, an inch or less apart,
Warm breath, warm hearts, but our thoughts
Are not on our beautiful art.
You dance alone, though I hold you close to me.
I dance alone also, hoping no one can see,
Our dance, a dance of love performed without fire,
Mechanically sound, but lukewarm,
Two people, not lovers, make us a frozen pair,
Lukewarm,and our hearts are not quite there.